Roxilla

hmm, not quite what we expected...

So I’m 2 days into this whole online dating thing, and have to say that it’s not really at all what I thought it would be. Well, in some ways it is, but in other ways, it’s kinda different. I’m doing this partly as a social experiment, partly for work purposes and I guess also partly just to see what happens. Can’t be a jaded, heartless cynic forever right, and what do I really have to lose? I don’t see it being much different to blogging or Twitter, and not like I haven’t hooked up with anyone or dated anyone through that medium.

After a few short days of being spammed to death, here are some of my thoughts on online dating:

* There are WAY more guys than girls out there – either that, or guys are just putting themselves out there more. Whatever the case, much as I hate to say it, mostly they seem kinda desperate.
* Some are pushy, and a little rude – general rule of thumb, if I don’t reply to the first message, I’m unlikely to reply to the second, and highly unlikely to reply to the third. Sheesh.
* Many of them are in the 35 – 40+ age group – not too surprising, online dating is a good way for divorcees, widowers and others like that to have a chance at finding love again. For me though, 35/36 is kinda as old as it gets, for now anyway.
* Guys love the outdoor vibe – almost all the profiles I’ve seen, especially the hotter, interesting ones, love their outdoor stuff, and want a lady who is also able to appreciate the fun in abseiling, camping or hiking. Nothing wrong with this, I would probably be amped to go abseiling or something fun… but that doesn’t mean I want to do it all the time.
* Guys are turned off by sarcasm and assertiveness – not such a newsflash, most guys don’t really like bitchiness or attitude, and can’t blame them really. Still, sometimes it comes out when I’m trying to be on my best behavior. Guess I need to work on the smile and nod approach!
* Guys don’t seem to care about body size generally – the most common preferences seem to be pretty much everything from slim to average to curvaceous. Some were more specific with slim or athletic, but mostly these were the under 30′s.
* Just like in real life, guys have to try harder – from their rather amusing names, to their earnest, heart-bearing profiles and carefully posed profile pics, they put themselves out there, even if they have a 30% match chance. It’s kinda cool really.
* So many more people are doing the online dating thing than you think – I’ve seen peeps I follow on Twitter, people I know in real life and many others I know from various places and spaces.
* You get what you put into it – like anything else, if you just sit back and wait for things to happen, you probably won’t get much luck. You have to at least try to put yourself out there and approach people – even if nothing comes of it, at least you are doing it properly rather than just waiting around for something to happen.
* It’s a lot more fun than I thought it would be – yes, I know it’s mean to laugh at some of these profiles, but I can’t help it – so much of funny! Aside from that, it’s also an entertaining way to spend my breaks. One or two people have even managed to hold my interest beyond a message or two.
* It’s a lot like real life – to make the right impression, you have to put in a bit of effort and show yourself as you want people to see you. In the online dating world, that means a good RECENT photo, a good profile and a good attitude. IRL, that means putting on a hot dress, a good smile and surprise surprise, a good attitude.

Will see what happens over the next month, but so far, it’s not all that bad – just like real life, you have to sift through a huge amount of coal before you find the odd diamond. Online dating is much the same… amidst all the total no-hopers there are a few interesting ones that make it kinda worthwhile.

my verdict so far? Definitely worth a try – who knows what may come of it, but at the very least at least you’re trying something new!