RIP Travis
I am so unbelievably annoyed at an article I just read on IOL tonight, about a 10 year old ‘domesticated’ chimp who attacked his owner’s friend for ‘no apparent reason’ and had to be shot by the cops.
The chimp used to be a ‘TV star’ (ie. it was most likely orphaned as a baby and sold into the animal entertainment market) and was living with some silly cow. It drank out of stemmed wineglasses and did all sorts of clever human things, and apparently it was fine for years… until the day it suddenly went ballistic.
Interesting to note that on this day, the chimp was acting distressed, so the owner slipped a Xanax into its tea. Xanax, the friggin’ hardcore anti-anxiety drug. Anyway, that clearly didn’t work as expected, as the chimp ended up attacking its owner’s friend, and the owner had to stab it to let her go.
Eventually, the cops rocked up, the chimp went for them too, and surprise surprise, they shot Travis to hell and gone. Now everyone is all upset and wondering what happened.
Clue: it’s a wild animal people, and it’s been exploited for most of its life! It’s living in a totally unnatural environment and it’s being treated like a child. It’s a classic case of a sad middle-aged lady substituting an innocent defenseless animal for the kids she can’t have. Or, if she does have kids, then she is just too stupid to understand that animals belong in the wild, or at the very least in a rehabilitation center with OTHER animals and a natural environment.
It should be illegal to ever use wild animals in any kind of entertainment, and as for people being able to keep them as pets… they deserve every bite they get for being so selfish and stupid!
I’m sorry if that comes across as unreasonable and irrational, but it really upsets me reading about shit like this, and it’s high time laws across the world started protecting wild animals against this sort of thing.
Ok, I’m going to have some more Lindt chili chocolate and take a deep breath. Aaah. That’s better.
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UPDATE: So turns out this silly cow may face criminal charges. The chimp was sick with Lyme’s Disease, and she was slipping him un-prescribed Xanax. They should arrest her and force her to do free PSA’s to highlight the plight of animals in entertainment!
Stabbing the chimp with a butcher’s knife might not have been the best move. Clearly she loved her pet so dearly that she was prepared to knife it to death.
Didn’t the useless woman think of turning a hose on the animal?
I think she should be sent to prison for attempted murder. After all, she did treat it like a member of the family, right up until she decided to start knifing it.
And the cops are useless with animals. All they know is to shoot it dead. Animal control should have been called in to tranquilise it.
She shouldn’t have had the thing as a pet in the first place, so she should be charged with her friend’s medical bills as well.
Oh, I bet her ‘friend’ is going to sue the shit out of her. I’m pretty sure this is the end of their friendship.
The woman will be needing a new pet. I recommend a Kalahari lion.
Bon appetit.
French Waiter: ‘Would you like some gravy with your human, Monsieur Leo?”
Lion: ‘No sank you, I’m totally schtuffed!”
Haha.
I think my magnificent joke deserved at least 3 ha’s.
Ha ha ha then.
poor chimp
Ja, very sad story.